Secrets and Sake
by krys2007
Summary: After Jinchuu, the Kenshingumi, decide to have a party. Aoshi once said that he has no tolerance for sake...So the gang (mostly Sanosuke), try to get him to explain why; prompting the others to spill some secrets if their own. Expect all kinds of madness, turbulence and hilarity to ensue. *CANON SETTING* * One-Shot* x


**A/N: Hello to anyone still out there reading RK stories. This wonderful APP called Netflix, uploaded all three seasons of RK and it brought on a bit of nostalgia. Rurouni Kenshin was one of the few anime shows I watched growing up, and I downloaded the manga. I am not new to fanfiction, as I have been reading different fandoms for years. However this is my first RK story. I have lost count on how many RK stories I read, but I wanted to take a shot at it.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own Rurouni Kenshin, nor am I making any profits. This is purely for fun.**

 **Prompt: Aoshi once said that he has no tolerance for sake, the gang tries to get him to explain why. Expect all kinds of madness, turbulence and hilarity to ensue.**

 **Warning: While some of these confessions might be disturbing, it will also serve as a friendly reminder as to why you should drink responsibly ^_^×. I will do my best to keep the characters true to themselves. I will also be referring to events from both the anime and the manga.**

 ***CANON SETTING; AFTER ENISHI'S REVENGE ***

* * *

It was a long three weeks of physical and mental recovery, for everyone. While the recovery was long, the repairing of the dojo was longer, not to mention expensive. But luckily with the help some of the towns people, along with their friends from the Akabeko, the repairs were finished a little over a month ago.

Since the ENISHI incident, Kenshin and Kaoru have gotten closer, and this hasn't gone unnoticed to the others. Once Kenshin was fully healed, the duo went for a long walk on a full moon night and shyly yet openly discussed their relationship. Things were progressing slowly, but they were officially courting.

Misao and Aoshi returned from giving their comrades proper burials in Kyoto. Megumi was due to leave for Aizu soon but decided to stay until after the party. Sanosuke, apparently got into some trouble while he was away, and was now a wanted fugitive. But somehow the chief was able to send his officers on a wild goose chase in order to give the fighter time to say his goodbyes and escape. After bestowing Yahiko his place, he informed his friends that he made arrangements to leave at dawn.

What Kenshin said was true, eventually everyone leaves to find their way. It was a sad to think that as quickly as they all came together, they would once again separate in the blink of an eye.

But now was not the time for unhappy thoughts. It was time to celebrate. The celebration of life, love, friendships, forgiveness, atonements, finding answers, and new beginnings.

Courtesy of the Akabeko, a wide spread of various sushi, miso soup, steamed sweet buns, beef hot pot, varieties of tea, and yens worth of bottled sake were present.

The gang sat in full circle eating, laughing, and drinking enjoying the new found peace.

"It's great to have everyone here, and in one piece, well everyone except Saito." Kaoru stated.

"You actually _invited_ that jerk?" Sanosuke asked.

"Now now...Saito is an ally and he helped out a lot that he did." The former rurouni replied.

"He's after your life Kenshin." Sano responded flatly.

"I believe that's no longer the case, that I do. Saito's quarrel is with the battousai, that it is. And besides, fighting on opposite sides doesn't necessarily make one an enemy, that it doesn't."

"Kenshin's right. He may be twisted, and had his own reasons, but I don't think he's that bad of a guy." Kaoru added.

"You know what I can't believe? I can't believe that walking cigarette made us think he was dead." Sanosuke said pouring a drink and downing it…"No seriously, I bet if you cut that bastard, he would bleed smoke. Like his insides are vapor."

"Do you have any idea how idiotic you sound?" Megumi arched her brow.

"I bet even his piss is smoke; he could smoke himself." Sano continued.

"Tch whatever, He's probably in a dark hole somewhere." Yahiko laughed.

"Or hanging upside down from a tree wrapped in a cocoon made of his own wings." Added Sanosuke.

* * *

Somewhere in a Soba Noodle House, a man sneezes then takes another drag of his cigarette. "hmph, moron."

* * *

Everyone, excluding Aoshi, who was more than satisfied with his tea, continued to indulge in sake and meal spread. He took a few mental notes about the kenshingumi.

"No more sake for you Yahiko! You're not do anything but pass out….you're still a kid." Kaoru chided her student.

"I'm not a kid you ugly hag!" Then he smirked. "You should stock up Kaoru, because a drunk is the only way you'll get a husband!" She glared daggers at him. He stuck his tongue out of her, and to everyone's amazement, she pulled a bokken out of thin air and bashed him over the head with it.

"So, Aoshi Shinomori." Sanosuke eyed the only fully sober one of the group. He arched his brow, the only visible sign of his acknowledging the ex fighter.

"I am curious. Why is it that you don't drink sake?" At his inquiry, the group stopped what they were doing and focused their attention to Aoshi.

"My reasons are my own. And I believe I have already explained that I have no tolerance." He former leader answered.

"Yeah… but for you to say you have no tolerance, means that you have some experience with sake. Which means something happened to make you not want to ever touch the stuff, so what was it?" Aoshi sent him a glare which he ignored and grinned.

Sensing Aoshi's irritation, Kenshin intervened.

"Now now Sano…"

"Awe come on! We're all friends right? We've been to hell and back….look how about this, what if we each say an embarrassing story that happened to us while drunk." He slurred. "I'm sure your experience is not as bad as you think it was."

Everyone just stared at him expectantly, and he sighed.

"Fine, I'll go first. One time, I woke up naked on a dusty futon, and next to me was this old relic of a woman…and I'm not exaggerating, she was old." His response was a mixture of shocked, and horrified faces. "Don't look at me like that! I was set up…the bastards. They swore nothing happened between me and the fossil, but she was awfully handsy." he shuddered.

"Ugh, do you have no shame?" Megumi frowned her face in disgust.

"Not when I'm drunk…the only thing that kept me sane was that I don't remember anything." He replied.

"You probably violated that poor woman!" Kaoru scolded.

"If anything she violated me! I'm the victim, I wasn't in my right mind." He defended himself.

"As if you have a right mind…idiot." Yahiko snorted, and Sanosuke growled.

"What did you say brat?"

"Can we talk about something else?" Kenshin tried to steer the conversation into a different topic.

"No. We're friends, and we're sharing. So who's next?" The ex fighter sat back folding his arms.

"No one agreed to share anything, you dumb rooster head!" Megumi retorted.

"Please, as shameless as you are I'm sure you have more than a few tales, _doctor_." He snorted.

"And just what is _that_ supposed to mean?" Megumi glared at him.

"What do you _think_ it means Opium Queen?" Seeing the hurt look in her eyes, he immediately regretted his words.

"Sanosuke!?" Kaoru gasped in horror. She couldn't believe he just said that. Before she could tell him to apologize, Megumi retaliated.

"How _dare_ you throw that in my face!" " _Zanza_?" She said mockingly. "Underground fighting? It's probably not the only thing you were doing underground."

"How would you like to be put underground!" he sneered at her.

"Now now Sano, Miss Megumi, this is supposed to be a party that it is. And I don't think that one would want to leave on bad terms because they let their temper get the best of them, and said things that they don't mean…that I don't." Kenshin said. Though he wasn't glaring or frowning, his firm eyes and tone left no room for argument.

The two looked away from one another, and sighed regretting their harsh words.

"You're right, Sir Ken as always. Sanosuke, I apologize."

"Forget it, I'm sorry too. That was wrong of me." Taking another drink, he shook it off and focused more on the topic. "But Seriously, what could be worst than waking up next to an old woman?"

The others groaned. He will not let this go.

"Waking up next to you!" Misao yelled.

"You would be so lucky, _Chopstick!_ "

"Chop….Chopstick!?" She spluttered.

"He means you have no shape." Yahiko said scratching his ear.

"I know what he _means_ you little brat!"

"Don't call me _little_ you weasel!"

"I'm not a weasel; I'm almost seventeen!" Misao proudly pointed out.

"Yeah, which means what you see, is what you get….Misao Makimachi, the old _straight and narrow_." Yahiko laughed.

"Die." Was all she said before she lunged at the young samurai. "What would you know? I distinctly remember you referring to a certain _male_ member of the Jubungata as….sexy!" She screamed as she placed him in a headlock. Everyone including Aoshi sweat dropped.

Directing their attention from the two Sanosuke tried a different approach.

"Fine, just think of it as getting to know each other better."

"Yeah, and we now know you have a thing for old women." Megumi smirked.

"Aww jealous?"

"Of course not…idiot! Anyway, don't have a story. A _proper_ lady such as myself, knows her limits." She said flipping her hair. Before Sanosuke could retort, Kaoru spoke up.

"Oh please, like you of all people can call themselves proper. You...are an opportunist."

"Excuse me? Did you say something raccoon girl?"

"You heard me." Everyone stops and looks pensive expecting Kaoru to physically attack the lady doctor, seeing how the kendo instructor's behavior is unpredictable as it was, it's worse when alcohol is involved.

"I am so tired of people always talking about the ideal _traditional and proper lady_. Well you know what?" Kaoru stood up on shaky legs and took a moment to gain her balance, glaring at her friends and future spouse.

"I am the _furthest_ thing from traditional. Who decides what's proper and what isn't? I Kaoru Kamiya, Assistant Master of the Kamiya Kasshin Ryu, am a woman and a swordsman. I own a dojo, I can't cook but I can knock a man unconscious."

She paused long enough to drown another cup of sake. Softening her features, she placed her hand on Kenshin's shoulder. "Kenshin, my rurouni; can cook, clean, and does the laundry. He enjoys it. And according to…whomever makes these rules, that's not a traditional man. Well, I don't care! Kenshin and I are _not_ traditional people, and I'll tell you something else…." She poured another cup. "Not only are we living together…" She took another drink and kenshin felt his stomach tighten unsure of what she was going to say next. "We've seen each other naked….."

"ORO!" He fell over, face completely drained of color. But she wasn't done.

"PLENTY OF TIMES!"

"ORO! M…Miss Kaoru this one assures you they were accidents that they were! This one would never peek on purpose that I wouldn't!"

"And what exactly are you saying Kenshin?" She turned her blazing eyes to him.

"N…nothing bad Miss Kaoru." He held his hands up in surrender. "It's just that this one is... well that is to say…" He paused when he realized what she just said. "Wait, how many times have you seen this one naked?"

"Oh what does it matter, Kenshin? I practically have you memorized." She rolled her eyes.

"Oro!" 0_0×

"Now where was I? Oh yes, and when we stayed at an inn on our way back to Tokyo, not only did we share a room, but a futon! That's right Megumi… we slept together, and we're not married. So how's that for traditional and proper!" She finishes the rest of her sake.

Oh, she is going to hate herself in the morning.

"Woo hoo! You tell em Missy…screw tradition!" Sanosuke cheered.

Kenshin's face was as red as his hair. There he sat, mouth agape blinking a few times before Sanosuke's cheer brought him out of his stupor. He then firmly but gently pulled Kaoru back down to sit and pried her hand away from the sake bottle she held before drowning the rest of it.

For once Megumi had nothing to say, but silently admired the girl for her bravery _. 'It's about time raccoon girl.'_

"How about you Kenshin?" Sanosuke asked after he settled down.

"Oro?"

"Anything you don't mind sharing?" He asked.

He was sure his face couldn't get any redder thanks to Miss Kaoru's outburst and declaration. Knowing Sanosuke wasn't going to let up, he sighed and opened another bottle. Pouring himself a cup, he downed it before beginning.

"Seijuro Hiko; 13th master of the Hiten Mitsurugi Ryu. It is no secret that the man loves sake. He's crude, cunning, conceited, sadistic, evil….. He's pure evil. One should never drink sake with this man. I had to learn this lesson the hard way…that I did."

"Uh Kenshin…."

"Where should I begin? As with any form of torture, one starts small. The first time, I wet my bed because he placed my hand in warm water. Second, I woke up tied to a tree that was hanging off a cliff. Third, he place ice in my ear so I would vomit. Fourth, he put a _skeleton_ next to me on my futon. The fifth time, I woke up in the middle of town wearing nothing but a diaper and a Kanji on my forehead that read ' _baka deshi_ ', and no matter how hard I scrubbed, the ink wouldn't come off for weeks." He then paused to take two more shots of sake, before continuing.

"Those were after passing out...that it was. I remember he somehow tricked me into dressing up as a geisha to get free sake. Another incident, involved me eating some funny mushrooms that made me laugh uncontrollably….and he convinced me I was dying."

' _Where the hell did he get a skeleton?'_ The fighter mused. But Kenshin just continued with his rant.

"I can hear him now, his narcissism has no limits; ' _baka deshi you're so ungrateful. It's all thanks to me that you have the high tolerance for alcohol. Being a master in the hiten mitsurugi Ryu you must excel in everything you do…baka!_ '" he mimicked the giant. "It wasn't the revolution that made me a paranoid light sleeper, it was _Him_."

* * *

Somewhere in the Kyoto mountains, a swordsman let out a powerful sneeze followed by a "Baka Deshi."

* * *

"So why do you still drink sake?" Aoshi asked.

"I'm more careful now…that I am. If I were to stop enjoying sake…then he wins." He said darkly. No one said a word at his sudden change in moods.

"Oh Kenshin…that's horrible." She hugged him as her eyes watered. Then with determined look in her eyes she wobbly stood up and pulled the just as tipsy kenshin with her.

"Oro? What are we doing?"

"Master or not, he's not getting away with what he did to _my_ Kenshin. My good bokken is in the dojo. Once we get it, it's off to Kyoto!" He blinked trying to focus, and stared at her flushed face.

"It's the middle of the night...that it is."

"Good. Then we'll have the element of surprise…. Let's go." With that, she drug a stumbling Kenshin off behind her.

"Shouldn't we stop them?" Aoshi asked looking in the door the two just left out of.

"Nah. The way those two stumbled out of here, I seriously doubt if they make it to the gate. They'll pass out in the dojo." Stretching his arms above his head, he tried one last time to get Aoshi to confess.

"Well Shinomori, how bout it?"

Looking around, the former leader of ninjas noticed the man had at least five empty jugs next to him. "How are you still conscious?" He asked, mildly shocked.

"Eh?" The ex fighter looked around and realized besides their two parted members, they were the only two still awake. Megumi, Misao, and Yahiko must have dozed during Kenshin's story. "I hadn't even noticed how quiet it got in here."

"Is looking and listening to you all not reason enough? Aoshi said.

"What do ya mean?" Sanosuke was curious.

"There's you Sagara, the loud drunk, Takani the flirtatious drunk, Yahiko the sleepy drunk, Kamiya the out of control drunk, and then there is Himura; the manipulated drunk. Who just proved he could be talked into doing anything." Aoshi pointed out as a matter of fact.

"We are not drunks. There is a difference between having a good time, and being a drunk. We are doing the former."

"Hmm." He helped himself to another cup of tea, and Sanosuke sighed.

"OK fine, since you're so reluctant to talk about it. What was the end result?"

Taking another sip of his tea he regarded the fighter for a minute before answering.

"I woke up naked on top of a Buddha Statue." At that, Sanosuke toppled over, leaving Aoshi alone sipping his tea.

* * *

 **A/N: And there you have it folks. I don't have a Beta, all mistakes if any, are mine. I was well aware of Kenshin's speaking pattern switching up….that was on purpose. ^_^×**

 **I sincerely hope you all had as much fun reading this as I have writing! So please leave a review and tell me what you think.**


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